Being a mom of two young kids has shown me the reality that if I don’t write it down, it’s as good as disappeared—like a sock in the laundry or my sanity on a Monday morning (or any morning, really). Of course, my “To-Do” list is full of the usual suspects: buy more diapers, schedule dentist appointments, try not to lose my mind.  But what if the real secret to productivity weren’t adding more to your to-do list, but creating a to-don’t list? That’s right—taking a moment to acknowledge the things you’re definitely not going to get done. Time to chuck the tasks that aren’t serving you into the “not today” pile.  Juggling life, work, and parenting is a whole lot easier when you remember WTF you are supposed to do today and when you finally give yourself permission to stop feeling guilty about the things that simply don’t make the cut.  Here are some tips to get started:

Be brutally honest

Start by writing down everything that’s been hanging over your head—then, ask yourself, “Do I really need to do this?” If it’s something that doesn’t align with your goals, values, or immediate priorities, it goes straight to the to-don’t list. No guilt, no excuses. Remember, it’s not about being lazy—it’s about being smart with your time.

Set boundaries with yourself (and others)

If people keep asking you to take on tasks that don’t move the needle for you, it’s time to make it clear that you’re not taking on more. Politely but firmly, add those requests to your to-don’t list. That way, you’re not constantly playing catch-up with everyone else’s priorities while your own gets shoved to the bottom.

Practice the power of “no”

It’s the simplest, yet hardest thing to master. But saying “no” is a skill, and when you do it intentionally, you create space for what really matters. Add any requests, invites, or opportunities you can’t commit to (or don’t want to) to your to-don’t list. It’s the ultimate act of self-care, and you’ll be amazed at how much lighter you feel.

And speaking of self-care

To make it even more powerful, add something about self-care, like “Don’t forget to rest” or “Don’t skip that walk.” The whole point of the “To-Don’t” list is to prioritize your well-being.

And please, don’t forget some Ta-Da!

This one’s all about celebrating what you’ve already done. At the end of the day, write down everything you accomplished, big or small. Don’t skip over anything. Did you answer an email? Ta-da! Did you take a 5-minute break? Ta-da! This list is a reminder that you’re killing it, even on the days when it feels like you’re just keeping your head above water.

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My hope is that this blog may be helpful, or dare I say inspirational to someone out there. So, you got any productivity hacks that help you stay sane and get stuff done? Share your secrets —we could all use a little extra magic in our to-do (and to don’t) lists!